The story
A common situation we see: a capable manager, and an employee whose performance had quietly slipped.
The manager did the right first thing and booked a conversation to set clearer expectations and offer support. The day before the meeting, a sick leave request arrived, citing stress.
When it was rescheduled, a flexible-working request followed: work from home, and a change of reporting line. Then more sick days.
The manager was stuck.
Every attempt to have the accountability conversation was met with an absence, and it was starting to feel like the leave was being used as a shield.
They did not want to be unfair to someone who might genuinely be unwell. They also could not let performance drift indefinitely, and the absence was now affecting the wider business.
This is the point where a lot of managers freeze, and where a quick call would have changed everything.
What happened here
- The foundations were thin. No clear record of the performance expectations or earlier conversations, so the manager felt on the back foot the moment leave entered the picture.
- Illness and performance had blurred together. Tangled up, the manager feared any performance step would look like punishing someone for being sick.
- No one had established the facts. Without a medical certificate or a clear picture of what was going on, the manager was left guessing whether this was genuine illness or an attendance issue, and guessing is a weak place to make decisions from.
- The flexible-working and leave requests were treated as obstacles, not information. They were, in fact, telling the manager something about how the employee was experiencing the situation.
- There was no plan for handling both matters fairly at once: genuine health support, and a fair, separate performance process.
- It got resolved months later through a ‘we need to clear things up and have a conversation invite letter’ along with the invitation to have a support person present and follow through with the agreed actions.
Building the foundations for better outcomes
- Clear, written performance expectations, set early, so a later absence doesn’t derail the conversation. The manager acts with confidence; the employee gets a fair, obvious picture of where they stand.
- Get to the bottom of what is really going on before drawing any conclusions. Establish the employee’s challenges and what support would help, rather than reacting to each absence in isolation.
- Encourage the employee to take responsibility for seeking professional support, such as EAP or appropriate medical advice, and (where appropriate) request the employee’s permission for having the medical professionals in communication with the employer. In some instances, it can take a village to get a clear picture and understand the circumstances and how support can be provided, if at all.
- Use medical certificates the right way. For an absence of three or more days you can ask for one; for shorter absences you can too, as long as you flag it early and cover the cost. Apply it to everyone the same way, and explain it as routine rather than an accusation, a certificate protects a genuinely unwell employee and gives you the facts to inform decisions.
- Name the real question: support, or accountability? Genuine ill health the person is experiencing is a capability matter to support, and a medical incapacity conversation if it becomes long-term. A pattern that is really about choices, absences around weekends and deadlines, notification steps skipped, explanations that don’t add up, is an attendance and conduct matter for a fair process. You can only tell the two apart once clear expectations, good records, and honest conversations are in place.
- Engage the right way. Start in writing, so expectations and offers of support are clear and on record, then move to a face-to-face conversation, and welcome the employee’s support person when they want one involved.
- Handle genuine health needs properly. Where a real illness means a long absence from a role the business genuinely needs filled, medical incapacity or flexible working can be the right, well-advised path, aimed at a supported return wherever possible, not a shortcut to an exit.
- Keep genuine health support and any performance process visibly separate. Kept apart, both are fair; tangled together, both become risky and slow.
- Make an early call to an HR partner. 15-minutes at the first sign of a tangle is the cheap version; untangling it months later, after a grievance, is the expensive one.
Where the law sits
Flexible-working requests, medical incapacity, good-faith obligations, and privacy around health information are all governed by the Employment Relations Act and Privacy Act.
An employee is entitled to bring a support person to a meeting that matters about their employment.
The safest path is to treat health needs seriously, follow a fair and well-documented process, and keep any performance matter separate.
The turning point
The employer in this story was not a villain.
They were a capable owner who simply did not have the foundations in place to handle two hard things at once.
With the right early support, the same situation becomes far more manageable, and often far more human, for everyone involved.
Imagine what could have been built before it reached this point.
This content is based on a general scenario we have encountered and provides general advice. For the best support for your specific situation, please contact the team for advice. The first 15 minutes are always free of charge.
